Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence

THE rate of violence in the world today is alarming that attention must be given to it. Violence is a problem that destroys a home or a society. It is a behaviour intended to hurt or kill somebody. Violence is an extreme form of aggression, such as assault, rape or murder. It is a kind of abuse to hurt individuals physically, emotionally, and psychologically. Violence can also be regarded as a crime which can be as a result of crisis or wars in countries or states. Every year there are cases of people loosing their lives to violence.

Violence is of different types but the most important one to be discussed here is the domestic violence which takes place every day in the world as a result of isunderstanding between two individuals that are engaged in a kind of relationship. It is an issue that people talk about everyday but no solution has been proffered to it.

Domestic violence is as old as man. As mentioned above, the key thing is that the perpetrators or the victims are in a kind of family relationship. It could be marriage or birth relationship. Whenever violence occurs in the family, women are usually blamed and accused of not being submissive to their husband or being too impatient.

Domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion or gender. It can happen to couples who are married, living together or who are dating. It affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and educational levels. It differs from country to country, and era to era.

Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern of behaviour in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. This means that most people engaged in a relationship wants to use it to gain control over their counterparts either for respects or fear. According to Merriam-Webster dictionary definition, domestic violence is: “the inflicting of physical injury by one family or household member on another; also: a repeated/habitual pattern of such behaviour”. Violence is a broader definition often used to include child abuse, elder abuse, and other violent acts between family members, wife abuse, wife beating, and battering. Domestic violence can also mean endangerment, criminal coercion, kidnapping, unlawful imprisonment, trespassing, harassment, and stalking.

Whenever marital/domestic violence is mentioned, people’s mind just race off to physical violence but that is not the only issue. It also includes psychological bettering of the wife by the husband. Marital violence is worse in our society where women’s rights are seen as something evil. Women generally in our society are supposed to be seen and not heard.

Domestic violence can take many forms but there is acknowledgement that many victims are not actually married to the abuser, but rather cohabiting or in other arrangements. Other forms of abuse may be constantly occurring, while physical abuse happens occasionally. Male, and females are victims of domestic violence but, most times females are victimized.

Women who are victims of domestic violence most times want to keep quiet to the good and bad things happening in their homes in order for peace to reign, but this is not the issue because it is better for you to tell your partner the truth about an issue in a respectful manner, not being abusive and harsh in your tone. Many women are dead, some are carrying internal injuries and have resigned to fate, saying: ‘that is how life is; who do I go and complain to? Who is going to take me in?; These are the things the women face to avoid divorce and other issues concerning break-ups in their relationships.

Causes Of Domestic Violence

There are certain things in the society that causes domestic violence and they include;

*cultural values: Culture is the way of life of the people, a belief that the Africans value so much. The African culture believes that when a woman is married, she is not supposed to come back to her father’s house and that her husband is in full control of her welfare or well-being. The Africa culture believes that a woman must respect her husband and be submissive to him. These beliefs make most men to behave in certain ways and say, ‘After all I have paid her bride price and she is under may control, no matter what happens she cannot go back to her family because, they will bring her back to me; This African culture that does not believe in divorce poses a problem to the women who are victims because they will be confused on what to do about the issue.

*Economic issues: The economic situation of the society is one of the causes of domestic violence in the sense that, the state of unemployment in the society has reduced the standard of living of the people. When a man is unemployed and need finances to take care of his family and those things are not forthcoming, this becomes a burden to the man and he begins to behave abnormal sometimes. When a man is in this situation, he is ready to beat his wife whenever she talks to him any how.

Another reason on this economic issue is that, there is no law governing the issue of domestic violence and this makes people to do it anytime without the fear of going to jail.

*Childlessness: Marriage without an issue most times causes domestic violence such that, when the man thinks of the gain in the marriage and there is nothing to show for it, the man gets angry with the woman even if it is not her fault. A marriage without the fruit of the womb, is a marriage of crisis because, there is nobody to look up to whenever issues arise.

* Sex: This is a physical activity that involves a woman and a man to take place. It is an emotional drive that is so terrible that when it occurs, it becomes difficult for the man or woman to control. A married man and woman staying together are supposed to satisfy each other in terms of sex to prevent the man or woman from misbehaving outside. Most times when men have this sexual drive and the woman seems to reject it in an aggressive way, it makes the man to be angry and this causes a problem between both of them.

* Jealousy: This is a state of being angry or unhappy because somebody you like or love is showing interest in somebody else. When a man or woman is having the feeling that his/her partner is interested or is cheating on him/her, this becomes a big problems in the house and it brings about domestic violence which could be verbal abuse/beating/emotional disorder.

Effects Of Domestic Violence

*Effects on children: Children who are exposed to domestic violence or domestic abuse during their childhood suffer from developmental and psychological problems. Due to domestic violence that some children face, emotionally, socially, behaviorally as well as cognitively. Some emotional and behavioral problems that can result due to domestic violence include; increased aggressiveness, anxiety and changes in how a child socializes with friends, family and authorities. It can be said that exposing children to family violence is child abuse.

*Physical effects: Bruises, broken bones, head injuries and internal bleeding requires medical attention and hospitalization. Some chronic health conditions that have been linked to victims of domestic violence are arthritis, irritable bowel syndrome, chronic pain, pelvic pain, ulcers and migraines. Pregnant women during domestic violence experience miscarriages, pre-term labour, and injury to or death of foetus.

*Psychological effects: Victims are made to feel guilty for generating the abuse and are frequently subjected to intense criticism. Victims of domestic violence experience long-term anxiety and panic, and are likely to meet the diagnostic criteria for generalized anxiety disorder and panic disorder.

*Financial effect:” Due to economic abuse and isolation, the victims usually has very little money of their own and few people on whom they can rely when seeking help are not there for them. In addition to lacking financial resources, victims of domestic violence often lack specialized skills, education, and training that are necessary to find gainful employment. The victims of this domestic violence most times, do not have a reasonable job they are doing to satisfy their need thereby relying on other persons.

Solutions to domestic violence

There is no problem without a solution provided the parties involved are committed to finding a solution. The most important thing is that, there should be serious law made by the government about the issue of domestic violence so that, when a person goes against the law he/she will be penalised according to what is contained in the law.

Another solution is that groups of persons like NGOs should be out to preach against domestic violence by telling the truth about the issue than taking sides and the government should budget for such things.